StartingOverNow.com
Articles
Be More Productive - How to Help Yourself and
the People Around You Exceed Goals
We wonder why the employees we manage or the children we parent
or the people we love do not seem to listen or care about what we have
to say. The reason is actually very easy to understand. The reason is
actually very easy to understand and once understood - to remedy.
The Delusion
Often we operate in a delusion. We do not prioritize caring about
people as much as we care about getting what we want. Then we
justify our own negative behavior toward them by viewing them almost
as inanimate objects – as if we HAVE to treat them impersonally
because they deserve it. Does this make them want to perform better
for us the way inspired and engaged people do? No.
The Delusion and Your Children
Think about it – You want your teenage child, whose grades are less
than adequate, to do his homework so you tell him he better do it or he
is going to get bad grades, not get into a good college and will not be a
success. Makes sense, right? Makes sense to you but not to him. He
hears you say, “You get bad grades, will never go to a good college and
will end up a loser.” Ugh! Do you think he cares what you think when
you think he is a loser? Of course not. So he tunes you out for being
overbearing, negative, and critical. He then under-performs to control
the situation and get back at you. And subsequently do you end up
feeling overbearing, negative, critical not to mention ineffective? Yep.
So consequentially he is justified in his feelings about you and you are
justified in your feelings about where he is going to end up. Everyone
is living a delusion because of course he could do his homework and
go to a good school and be a success. And of course your leading
qualities are not to be overbearing, negative and critical. You can only
control your role in any delusion.
Could it be that as parents sometimes we want our children to perform
well so that we can feel good about it? As a manager do we
sometimes want our employees to perform well so that we will look
good? In relationships do we sometimes want or loved ones to make
us feel loved and appreciated so that we are happy? Yes. That is
human nature. So how do we get there? By caring about them as
people first and ourselves second. That is what makes us truly human
– to care about others in a way we would never care about an object –
to care about them before ourselves. So when we do not see people
as people but mere objects for our own good, we have betrayed
ourselves.
You might say to your son, “I love you and want to help you feel good
about doing your homework. Can I help you organize your homework
or get some special tools to help you?” He’ll of course look at you as if
you have three heads. You’ll continue, “You said that you like
business. I’d like for us to visit a friend of mine who is an investment
advisor together so that you can ask him questions about what he
does. I think it might be really interesting for both of us.” At this point he’
ll be waiting for the catch. “How about next Monday after school? I’ll
leave work early.”
The Delusion and Your Employees
Think about how this plays out in work. You think you care about your
employees or your colleagues. You don’t micro-manage them nor are
you demanding. You give them little gifts at holidays. You occasionally
ask them about their children. Yet they don’t seem to care about the
company or worse yet helping you to look good. They don’t really have
your back. Your Delusion - So therefore they are lazy and ungrateful
and don’t deserve for you to provide opportunities for them to learn and
grow.
Your colleagues notice that all you seem to focus on is your work. You
don’t even know the names of some of their spouses and you never
talk about helping them learn anything new. And you don’t keep them
informed on what the vision is for their area. Their Delusion –
Therefore you are a work-a-holic with no life who doesn’t care about
them or whether or not they move up in the company so why should
they work hard for you?
What the Delusion Costs You
End Result – As a manager, your area is not as productive as it needs
to be. As employees, their work is unfulfilling. This leads to high
attrition, employee disengagement and low productivity. All of these
boil down to lost money and purpose for all involved – the business
looses money and the manager and the employees don’t advance.
The Solution to Delusion
Stop betraying yourself by seeing those around you as a means to your
own fulfillment. I am a fan of visualization techniques. Look hard at the
faces of the people close to you in your office, your close relationships
and your life and ask yourself if you value them as a person or as an
inanimate object. Are you living a delusion of self-betrayal by detaching
from then because you perceive they don’t deserve better? And has the
repetitive nature of your choices brought any better engagement from
your staff, colleagues and loved ones? Try seeing the people you lead
and care about as small children who need guidance. Envision what
they would look like as a seven-year-old. Every time you interact with
the people close to you, envision them as children who need a helping
hand, who need guidance, who need love. Then watch them change
their behavior. Start now!
Follow Mary Lee's career tips on Twitter.com at StartingOverNow.
For the FREE Articles: “It’s Not Who You Know It’s Who knows You” and
“Goals - What They Did for Me” go to: http://www.startingovernow.
com/Articles-and-Tip-Sheets.html
Mary Lee Gannon is a coach, cultural turnaround and leadership
expert who went from being a stay-at-home mother with four children to
a difficult marriage, divorce, homelessness, and welfare to CEO. Her
book "Starting Over - 25 Rules When You've Bottomed Out" is available
on Amazon.com and shows how she went from an earning capacity of
$27,000 annually to president and CEO within just a few years. Sign up
for her free e-Newsletter.
the People Around You Exceed Goals
We wonder why the employees we manage or the children we parent
or the people we love do not seem to listen or care about what we have
to say. The reason is actually very easy to understand. The reason is
actually very easy to understand and once understood - to remedy.
The Delusion
Often we operate in a delusion. We do not prioritize caring about
people as much as we care about getting what we want. Then we
justify our own negative behavior toward them by viewing them almost
as inanimate objects – as if we HAVE to treat them impersonally
because they deserve it. Does this make them want to perform better
for us the way inspired and engaged people do? No.
The Delusion and Your Children
Think about it – You want your teenage child, whose grades are less
than adequate, to do his homework so you tell him he better do it or he
is going to get bad grades, not get into a good college and will not be a
success. Makes sense, right? Makes sense to you but not to him. He
hears you say, “You get bad grades, will never go to a good college and
will end up a loser.” Ugh! Do you think he cares what you think when
you think he is a loser? Of course not. So he tunes you out for being
overbearing, negative, and critical. He then under-performs to control
the situation and get back at you. And subsequently do you end up
feeling overbearing, negative, critical not to mention ineffective? Yep.
So consequentially he is justified in his feelings about you and you are
justified in your feelings about where he is going to end up. Everyone
is living a delusion because of course he could do his homework and
go to a good school and be a success. And of course your leading
qualities are not to be overbearing, negative and critical. You can only
control your role in any delusion.
Could it be that as parents sometimes we want our children to perform
well so that we can feel good about it? As a manager do we
sometimes want our employees to perform well so that we will look
good? In relationships do we sometimes want or loved ones to make
us feel loved and appreciated so that we are happy? Yes. That is
human nature. So how do we get there? By caring about them as
people first and ourselves second. That is what makes us truly human
– to care about others in a way we would never care about an object –
to care about them before ourselves. So when we do not see people
as people but mere objects for our own good, we have betrayed
ourselves.
You might say to your son, “I love you and want to help you feel good
about doing your homework. Can I help you organize your homework
or get some special tools to help you?” He’ll of course look at you as if
you have three heads. You’ll continue, “You said that you like
business. I’d like for us to visit a friend of mine who is an investment
advisor together so that you can ask him questions about what he
does. I think it might be really interesting for both of us.” At this point he’
ll be waiting for the catch. “How about next Monday after school? I’ll
leave work early.”
The Delusion and Your Employees
Think about how this plays out in work. You think you care about your
employees or your colleagues. You don’t micro-manage them nor are
you demanding. You give them little gifts at holidays. You occasionally
ask them about their children. Yet they don’t seem to care about the
company or worse yet helping you to look good. They don’t really have
your back. Your Delusion - So therefore they are lazy and ungrateful
and don’t deserve for you to provide opportunities for them to learn and
grow.
Your colleagues notice that all you seem to focus on is your work. You
don’t even know the names of some of their spouses and you never
talk about helping them learn anything new. And you don’t keep them
informed on what the vision is for their area. Their Delusion –
Therefore you are a work-a-holic with no life who doesn’t care about
them or whether or not they move up in the company so why should
they work hard for you?
What the Delusion Costs You
End Result – As a manager, your area is not as productive as it needs
to be. As employees, their work is unfulfilling. This leads to high
attrition, employee disengagement and low productivity. All of these
boil down to lost money and purpose for all involved – the business
looses money and the manager and the employees don’t advance.
The Solution to Delusion
Stop betraying yourself by seeing those around you as a means to your
own fulfillment. I am a fan of visualization techniques. Look hard at the
faces of the people close to you in your office, your close relationships
and your life and ask yourself if you value them as a person or as an
inanimate object. Are you living a delusion of self-betrayal by detaching
from then because you perceive they don’t deserve better? And has the
repetitive nature of your choices brought any better engagement from
your staff, colleagues and loved ones? Try seeing the people you lead
and care about as small children who need guidance. Envision what
they would look like as a seven-year-old. Every time you interact with
the people close to you, envision them as children who need a helping
hand, who need guidance, who need love. Then watch them change
their behavior. Start now!
Follow Mary Lee's career tips on Twitter.com at StartingOverNow.
For the FREE Articles: “It’s Not Who You Know It’s Who knows You” and
“Goals - What They Did for Me” go to: http://www.startingovernow.
com/Articles-and-Tip-Sheets.html
Mary Lee Gannon is a coach, cultural turnaround and leadership
expert who went from being a stay-at-home mother with four children to
a difficult marriage, divorce, homelessness, and welfare to CEO. Her
book "Starting Over - 25 Rules When You've Bottomed Out" is available
on Amazon.com and shows how she went from an earning capacity of
$27,000 annually to president and CEO within just a few years. Sign up
for her free e-Newsletter.
StartingOverNow.com
Articles
People who use the
FREE resources on
this site are:
* Starting over in
their career or
personal life
* Empty nesters
* Entrepreneurs
* Networking
* Job Seekers
* Starting all over
again
* Going through a
divorce
* Looking for career
opportunities
* Seeking FREE
career advice and
education
* Finding mentors
* Setting new life
goals
To chart your road
map to success
click here for FREE
"Worksheets and
Articles."
FREE resources on
this site are:
* Starting over in
their career or
personal life
* Empty nesters
* Entrepreneurs
* Networking
* Job Seekers
* Starting all over
again
* Going through a
divorce
* Looking for career
opportunities
* Seeking FREE
career advice and
education
* Finding mentors
* Setting new life
goals
To chart your road
map to success
click here for FREE
"Worksheets and
Articles."
Help
Yourself
and the
People
Around You
Exceed
Goals
Stop seeing
people as a
vehicle of your
own fulfillment
and inspire them
by caring about
them as people.
Yourself
and the
People
Around You
Exceed
Goals
Stop seeing
people as a
vehicle of your
own fulfillment
and inspire them
by caring about
them as people.
Turnaround Solutions for People & Organizations
Whether you are an executive who is "stuck," your company needs
better productivity, or you are in a life transition you represent the
people and organizations Executive Leadership Coach Mary Lee has
helped. Learn how to clarify direction, create strategy, upgrade skills,
optimize your environment and wipe out fear and doubt. Make it fun =
get more done!
Mary Lee’s strategies from her book “Starting Over” helped her in her
own transformation from stay-at-home mother with four children living
a country club life to the reality of a difficult marriage, divorce, poverty,
welfare and then on to president and CEO. Eliminate self doubt, under-
performance, money fears, relationships woes, and negative influence
so that you may soar. Then lead others to improve their lives and your
business. Start now! For a FREE introductory coaching session via
phone email info@startingovernow.com.
Whether you are an executive who is "stuck," your company needs
better productivity, or you are in a life transition you represent the
people and organizations Executive Leadership Coach Mary Lee has
helped. Learn how to clarify direction, create strategy, upgrade skills,
optimize your environment and wipe out fear and doubt. Make it fun =
get more done!
Mary Lee’s strategies from her book “Starting Over” helped her in her
own transformation from stay-at-home mother with four children living
a country club life to the reality of a difficult marriage, divorce, poverty,
welfare and then on to president and CEO. Eliminate self doubt, under-
performance, money fears, relationships woes, and negative influence
so that you may soar. Then lead others to improve their lives and your
business. Start now! For a FREE introductory coaching session via
phone email info@startingovernow.com.
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
FREE Resources
to help you:
1. United States of America's
primary source on career
information:
www.onetcenter.org
2. Wage Estimates
www.salary.com and Bureau of
Labor and Statistics
3. Organize Your Job Search -
Post a Question etc.:
www.cvtips.com
4. Starting Over After Divorce:
www.womansdivorce.com
5. Starting Over for Women:
www.makingbreadmagazine.co
m
6. Self Improvement:
www.selfgrowth.com.
7. Job Postings, Resume
Advice and Resources:
www.careerbuiler.com
8. Templates for: business
plans, competitive analysis,
start up costs and more:
www.score.org/business_toolbox
.html
9. Federal/Sate/Local
Government jobs:
www.USAJOBS.com
10. U.S. Government's Free
online courses, webinars and
podcasts for workforce
development:
www.onetacademy.com.
11. Occupational Outlook
Handbok 2008-09 by Bureau of
Labor and Statistics:
http://www.bls.gov/oco/home.ht
m
to help you:
1. United States of America's
primary source on career
information:
www.onetcenter.org
2. Wage Estimates
www.salary.com and Bureau of
Labor and Statistics
3. Organize Your Job Search -
Post a Question etc.:
www.cvtips.com
4. Starting Over After Divorce:
www.womansdivorce.com
5. Starting Over for Women:
www.makingbreadmagazine.co
m
6. Self Improvement:
www.selfgrowth.com.
7. Job Postings, Resume
Advice and Resources:
www.careerbuiler.com
8. Templates for: business
plans, competitive analysis,
start up costs and more:
www.score.org/business_toolbox
.html
9. Federal/Sate/Local
Government jobs:
www.USAJOBS.com
10. U.S. Government's Free
online courses, webinars and
podcasts for workforce
development:
www.onetacademy.com.
11. Occupational Outlook
Handbok 2008-09 by Bureau of
Labor and Statistics:
http://www.bls.gov/oco/home.ht
m
| Mary Lee Gannon is interviewed on Mind Your BIZness |
Listen to Mary
Lee's interview
"From Welfare
to CEO" on the
Renee Bobb
Show on
BlogTalk
Radio.com.
Lee's interview
"From Welfare
to CEO" on the
Renee Bobb
Show on
BlogTalk
Radio.com.
Gannon Group/StartingOverNow.com
Executive Leadership Coaching - Productivity Solutions for People and Organizations
Executive Leadership Coaching - Productivity Solutions for People and Organizations
Get the FREE e-Book "Lead Your
Team with Values and Watch
Productivity Grow - A
Manager's Toolbox"
and the Executive Coaching Newsletter
.
Team with Values and Watch
Productivity Grow - A
Manager's Toolbox"
and the Executive Coaching Newsletter
.
Mary Lee Gannon's
Book "Starting Over" is
available in bookstores
everywhere or at
Amazon.com - 5 Stars!
Book "Starting Over" is
available in bookstores
everywhere or at
Amazon.com - 5 Stars!
Follow Mary Lee's tips
and information on these
Social Networking sites:
and information on these
Social Networking sites:
